Once upon a time, there was a woman who loved to learn about new stuff. She loved many things, actually – learning, people, trees, dogs, music, Halloween (well, except for candy corn 🤢), and putting things in order, to name a few. Because that last part, Order, was such a big part of her comfort zone, it became more prominent in her life than most other things people noticed about her. And because she felt very much at home teaching and helping all those lovable people, she allowed Order to take over and be the “thing” that defined her for a time.
Many of the people she enjoyed helping were all over this particular thing – like pesto on spaghetti. They were of a tribe that wandered the Earth seeking organization, even as it often remained mysterious and out of reach. This tribe had other outstanding attributes – creativity, heart, spontaneity, persistence, ingenuity – though they usually didn’t take time to acknowledge these soul-level gifts. And so she listened to them and did her best to encourage them in their Life Order journeys, so that the gifts might rise to the surface and support all kinds of nifty pursuits.
But these old ways of working, teaching, and helping began to feel incomplete. The woman recognized that other things in her life were worth digging deeper into, and she became curious about why all the things couldn’t be or shouldn’t be… [cue that annoying needle-scratching-vinyl sound]…
This tale is going to have to be a two-parter, dear readers. Some background is required.
“Wholeness is not achieved by cutting off a portion of one’s being, but by integration of the contraries.” – Carl Jung
These past several months, it’s been a challenge to put together language for how my spiritual work fits into how I coach and share life order ideas with folks. If I had to pick a superhero to be, my kids know I’d choose Word Girl (a somewhat obscure character on PBS – any other fans out there?). Words are important to me because, used thoughtfully, they are an external link to inner clarity. Words are symbols of what’s rattling around inside our heads, after all. Symbols bring what is ineffable into clearer expression.
So anyway, it’s been a fun puzzle to find language lately, and explain to people what my spiritual direction education has to do with being an ADHD coach or a professional organizer. Then again, a few people have gotten it without any explanation at all. Maybe I’m projecting a bit – maybe I haven’t known what it has to do with those things, even as I intuitively know it all makes sense together. You know, “holistic life order,” and “stuff behind the stuff,” and all that jazz? I’ve always said that organization and time management don’t exist in silos, separate from who we are, what we choose to do, and what we care most about.
Maybe too, the problem comes with the labels “professional,” “organizer,” or even “ADHD.” The words are fine, but come with certain preconceived notions and biases. “Coach” may come closer to what feels authentic. It still doesn’t totally encompass what I hope to start bringing forward.
I have some ideas about how to help people live more organized lives, yes. Those ideas have resonated pretty well for a while (11 years now 😮).
I have ideas about how my clients with ADHD and/or other neurodiversity can manage more comfortably and skillfully in a world that doesn’t honor their wiring. Ideas, and ways of listening so that they come into their own comfort and skill. I think that’s been working decently well, too.
I’m not perfect, of course. And I’m not everyone’s coach or organizer.
But now I have ideas about how connecting people to what Carl Jung described as “inner work” can lead to a deeper grasp of Life Order. Connecting with and relating to the spiritual (not the religious, mind you; that’s something different) allows us to transcend brain wiring and the labels. I suspect it helps us to trust ourselves more, and I want to test that theory.
No worries – I still like to talk about clearing and organizing physical spaces – and I love, love, love hearing about what my clients do with their own. Give me a cluttered drawer or closet any day, turn me loose with the label maker, and look at me go.
I still enjoy working with time, schedules, calendars, lists, and daily rhythms. I’ll teach other coaches a class on that exact topic here in a few weeks, and I’m super excited to see what emerges.
I will always work with clients with ADHD. At least, for as long as they’ll put up with me.
But underneath all of that stuff is us—whole humans. We are not our bins, baskets, planners, apps, or timers – we’re spiritual beings traveling around in our Earth suits. And if we can tap into who we are, as opposed to what the world expects or attempts to force us to be, how much easier might it be to do “all the things”?
I’m going to assume that some out there are thinking (eyebrow raised), “Why mess with what’s working, girl? Why would you want to change anything?” The response would be that I can’t not change. Maybe I’m not even changing all that much, but rather being more overt about what’s always been true. Besides, clients come to me looking for change. Why should they get to have all the fun?
Stay tuned for Part 2, in which I attempt to finish a fairy tale with a clear ending, make some distinctions about what spiritual work is and isn’t, and share more about what’s coming up with SkillSet.
I’m looking forward to part 2, and learning more about this new direction! It is important to “speak to” the whole person. We operate on many levels for sure.
Yes, I think it’s critical to remember that our clients are not their stuff. And all of those many levels intersect and intertwine. Glad you’re looking forward to Part 2 – it’ll help keep me accountable!
I am so excited and happy for you, Sara. I love how you arrived at “I can’t NOT change.” It’s wonderful that what you’ve been doing has worked and how many people you’ve helped. As you embark on this new part of your journey, you will be able to reach even more people in a deep, life-affirming way. I can’t wait to hear more about your path. Cheering you on all the way, my friend!
Thank you so much, Linda! Your enthusiasm is always such an encouraging boost 😊, and it means a lot to me.
I think you’re on to something, Sara. So many of the skills I teach are integrated – they have to be. No one skill exists without the others in some shape or form – planning works with managing time which works with preferences. I’m excited to see what’s next for Skillset.
Love that word, “integrated”. And what is meaningful to people at the deepest levels can inform so much in a positive way – if we can figure out how to connect – integrate – it all up. Thanks for the comment, Diane.
I love that you are embracing change that will lead you to do whatever is next to the best of your abilities. Thank you for sharing about your journey. I look forward to reading part 2.
Thanks, Julie – I appreciate the opportunity to share here, and read others’ thoughts about it all.
You know I love when you go all fable-mistress on us, so I’m locked in and ready for part 2 to show up. I honor your journey, and love that you can combine Word Girl and Carl Jung and be perfectly integrated and authentic. Rock on, Sara!
Oooh, “Fable Mistress.” I’m down for that :). And I like to think Jung would have loved Word Girl. Thanks for reading and supporting, as always!
Great blog Sara. Looking forward to part 2.
Thanks for stopping by, Janet!
Very cool. Looking forward to Part 2. I agree with all of this and trying to separate out organizing from the rest of the stuff is probably part of why I’ve not been successful in the past! Even if you are just articulating it I feel that you’ve brought some of this wholeness to coaching already and it’s why I love the work we do so much!
Thanks so much, Pem – happy to know that things are resonating, and looking forward to more great conversations with you!
I am very interested in reading part 2.
Me too – ha! 😉 Thanks for reading Part 1, Susan!
Love this. Thanks for sharing this journey. 🥰
Thanks for following along, Jennifer – miss seeing you!